Beaches are for tanning not swimming

Not much new to report. We have had a bit of fun hanging out with some new and old friends. Our friend Matt, who got us the job on the Spirit, has been graciously inviting us along on some outings with him and some of his friends. This has been really great for us. We actually feel like we sort of just maybe might have some friends. Overall, Matty is just a wonderful person and has been so kind to us helping us get out of our apartment a little bit...

For his birthday we went to Friday's for lunch and to the beach in Gloucester. It was a blast. But unlike beaches in the South, these beaches are not for swimming. Well, not for me! Some crazy New Englanders seem to think so but I humbly disagree. It was still a blast. We took lots of pictures and took in some beautiful staple Massachusetts sites!

The water is so blue! Nothing like The Gulf

Lucky people that live right on this beach.

Ok....these seagulls are HUGE! You might not be able to tell from the picture but trust me on this.

Tons of snails!

So apparently if you sing a really low note to snails, they come out!

See!!

Silly boys

The one and only Matthew Johnson! Thanks for being a great friend! 

Matty and Jessica, our driver and navigator to the beach.

Lighthouse

Life in Boston

People are always joking about Southern Hospitality vs. Rude Northerners and other such stereotypes: slow-paced vs fast-paced, hot vs cold, disgusting excuse for tea vs delicious sweet tea etc.

Well I have always been one to say that stereotypes exist for a reason! They didn't come out of nowhere. They aren't always racist, or bias, or sexist or not PC they are REAL! Stereotypes are basically an sometimes exaggerated generalization of a certain thing or people. I am here as living proof to tell you that the stereotypes about northerners are based in actual living breathing FACT called "The Massholes." (I didn't make that up. They call themselves that here...really??)

First of all, giving yourself a title as The Massholes doesn't make it okay to be rude. You can't just excuse yourself for your behavior because you have an official title for it. That is lame. 

Now that that is off of my chest....

It has been really difficult adjusting to how people move and function up here north of the mason-dixon line. My family considers Shreveport "the north" so I am basically feel like I am in the North Pole. Overall, people are solely worried about only themselves. They are focused on furthering their agenda. It is like no one else exists and they are unaware that other people might have something going on in their life too. People we haven't even met will just flat out be rude and/or order us around like we are less than them. WHAT!?! It is very hard not to stoop down to their level and just complain all the time. It becomes extremely exhausting being around negativity so often. Maybe it's because it is so cold in the winters. I will admit that being cold puts me in a bad mood sometimes. Or maybe it's because they are used to cold and right now it is hot and that puts them in a bad mood. I think it has a lot to do with the lack of spirituality in this part of the country. People don't have anything to believe in that is larger than themselves. They have nothing to live for therefore there is no point to life. But really life is good! It is so sad that so many people in our world don't realize that. I know people all over the country complain and are negative but I have never seen so many unhappy people in my life. A friend of mine who has lived here for a few years  now really deals with it well and I envy his ability to blow it off. His philosophy is that their unhappiness shouldn't effect his life. There is no need for him to break a sweat over someone else's problems. They don't really dislike you, but they take it out on everyone. Just because someone yells at me, doesn't mean they don't like me. They don't like themselves and they have to take it out on someone. It makes sense but it is so hard. When someone is rude to me and speaks to me disrespectfully I don't take to it well. My immediate response is to fight back, which apparently is a waste of time here.

I guess I will learn but it will definitely take some time and some re-evaluating my way of thinking and approach to each day. I can't keep going on upset everyday because I am offended my people's internal problems that they are taking out on the world. I really struggle between letting it go and fighting back. I have a bit of a pride issue when it comes to people mistreating me. I think "They can't get away with talking to me like that!" But really, it's not a battle between me and them. That's the hard thing for me to grasp. Where I am from, people aren't rude to you unless you did something to them and if they are snappy without cause, a lot of times you will get an explanation or apology...

...what a funky new world we are in. 

On a slighty different note, we have been a little bummed lately because we are realizing how hard it is to pursue what we love and pay the bills at the same time. We don't want to be professional waiters but we also don't want to be professional homeless people...At least Ben will be submerged in music once school starts. I really need to find some kind of outlet and path to begin doing what I love again and hopefully making the transition of it being a hobby to being my life and means to pay bills! But for now a singing/cocktail waitress will have to do!

Oh...and I will admit: ONE place has really good sweet tea. Shawn took us to a barbeque place in cambridge called Redbones Barbeque. It was delicious! I wonder if they sell mass quantities of sweet tea? 

This is work! It really is a blast working here. 

New Chapter

So apparently I am really bad at updating this...

3 new important changes in my life

1. I graduated college!

2. I am now Mrs. Chelcy Harrell

3. My wonderful husband and I live in Boston, Massachusetts...well Brighton, but Boston sounds cooler.

WOW! So much to catch up on! Since I really don't feel like typing too much right now here are a few pictures to help tell the story! : )

Walking down the aisle with dad. So excited to see Ben for the first time that day! I missed him!

Sand/Unity Ceremony

Yes, yes we will!!

Muah!

Mr and Mrs Benjamin P Harrell

We did it!

I can't wait to get our pictures back

Yummy cake that I didn't eat...I have had dreams about this cake lol

1st dance! "Darling, je vous aime beaucoup"

Packing up the moving truck

Our trusty driver!

Me and Mel riding shotgun. She was a little drugged up...

Lil riding in the middle...she was really drugged up as well...

Thanks Massachusetts. But are you really welcoming...? Thats a whole different blog...

This took a week to unpack. Gross.

Kitchen

Bathroom

Mel and the futon!

Our lovely painting : )

Other side of the living room. The TV is now mounted on the wall.

Bedroom

Other side of the bedroom

So there we go!! A nice little photo tour of the new chapter in my life. It all still seems like a dream. It's hard to believe I am a married lady and living in Boston. So far this past month has been extremely enjoyable. Hopefully I will do a better job of keeping up with my blog, chronicling my new adventures!

Countdowns and lists:

...All my life consists of right now...

Graduation: 32 days
Wedding: 59 days EEK!

My list of things do is slowly diminshing

I have successfully crossed off at least 20 items from the wedding list and a few from the life list!

Directing One-Act - check
Millie Opened - check
Paid last month of rent - check
Holy week services - check

Yet to check off....
*Ben's recital
*Finding somewhere to live
*Finding a job
*Hiring a moving company
*Finals
*Relay for Life
*Pushing Ben to get the music for the wedding done

...and various other minor detail things for the wedding such as writing the ceremony and vows! Those two things are the most important to the actual getting wed part and we have not written them yet! What?!

Though my list is still really big I am somewhat chipper thanks to the nice weather lately! I hope it sticks around for a little while. I have been in a really bad mood all week for some reason and that seems to be clearing up as well. Because of recent sad events occuring to a friend, I have gained a little perspective and decided that life is too short to be upset as much as I am! So as I continue counting down and crossing things off my lists I will try to do so a little more cheerfully!

I have also started reading a few new books. Wizard of Oz, The Red Tent , and The Power of Pain. All very good...

Lunchtime!

I have a feeling we're not in Kansas anymore...

Well ok, fine we never were in Kansas but these crazy Oklahoma wind gusts have decided to blow us straight northeast to Boston! Ben has been accepted into the grad program for composition at Boston Conservatory. Shortly after the wedding we will be heading up north! I am really proud of him and really excited. The area is so beautiful and rich with history. I think it will be an amazing adventure. I wish June was already here. However, we do need these next few months to save up for a deposit because Boston is really expensive! We have found a few cute places. We just need to decide if we want to live in the outskirts in a bigger place for cheaper but deal with transportation or if we want to do the whole city thing and live in a sardine can for way too much a month. Either way, I am so excited to be near the ocean and most importantly near New York City! It is about a 4 hour drive from Boston to New York! It's just unfathomable to me that I can wake up one day and say to myself "Self, let's go see a Broadway show!" and hop on a bus and DO IT! I can audition and visit friends that live there. It will be so amazing! The main thing I am not looking forward to is the weather. I'm sure I will get used to the cold but I was not built to deal with snow and negative temperatures. I need to get some more sweaters. It will be really exciting to experience all the seasons and the changing of the seasons.

Now I just have to survive the next 40ish days of school before all of this becomes a reality. I can not wait! I really have been missing Ben a lot lately. We have both been busy and he has been spending a lot of time with friends which is fine, but when I get home from my ridiculous days I would like to have a little time with him and most of the time at least 3 people are over whether they were invited or not. I am ready for him to be there all the the time (although some married couples may say I will regret saying that. I am definitely ready to be done with school and Oklahoma and a variety of other mundane things from this stage of life. It is time for the next one. So Oklahoma winds, take me to away!

Spring ... ???

March 20, 2010

49 days until graduation

76 days until I am a wife

First day of spring with 7 inches of snow on the ground

60 degrees in Ben's house

Lily's 2nd birthday

Last day of last spring break

With the clock ticking away for the end of the school year and the beginning of married life, I am slowly getting everything done to make those two things happen. I spent spring break in Texas and got a substantial amount of wedding stuff done. I got my bridal portraits made on the Marcus High School stage and that was a blast! I found a lovely girl to do my hair and she did a fabulous job. My dress and shoes and jewelry all go together really nicely. I can't wait to get the pictures back. Slowly and surely I am chugging along to the finish line. Though the next 49 days will be slow, this week definitely flew by, as most weeks off of school do. Once Monday is here the rest of school with be a whirlwind of tasks to complete that may or may not get done that hold my release from this HELL HOLE called school in the palms of their evil hands. But I still have tonight and tomorrow and relax a little bit.

Stick a fork in me...

....IM DONE! No but really, all cutesy attention getting title's aside. I am so done with this state, this city, this school, these people! I can't stand it anymore. I don't know how I am going to survive the next 61 days. It seems like an eternity away. I don't care if I am being negative. Get over it or stop reading my blog...(I don't think anyone reads this anyway..hmmm)

I have never been this stressed or angry in my entire life. I can not seem to genuinely smile at anything for longer than a few minutes before I am mad at the entire world again. College is not the best time of your life. That is a lie. That is only true for the irresponsible crowd that wallows away their time drunk and high and not taking their careers seriously. I am over those people. How old are we??? 16??? Do your rich parents know they are throwing 100K away so you can be a beligerent idiot! I am sick of no one ever understanding me or being like me. I am sick of being different. Why can't I just make bad decisions and throw my life away and be ok with it? It seems to be what makes people happy these days. Why can't I treat people like crap and be ok with it? Better yet, Why can't I treat people crap and still have 5000 friends? Why can't I treat people NICELY and have friends? Am I that awful to be around?? I have dealt with this my whole life and it hurts so bad to always feel left out because you don't do what everyone else does and no one understands you. There is no way I am the only person like this in the world!!

I know I am a really good friend, at least I thought so, unless I am completely delusional. I am not asking for anything in return for being a good friend and I don't do nice things to get rewarded but my resources are depleted. I can't keep giving and giving and GIVING AND GIVING! I don't want money or things or gifts. I want someone to listen to me and BELIEVE me. I sometimes feel like one of my biggest fears in coming true. I have always been afraid that one day I will go crazy and no one will believe anything I say because I am just "crazy Chelcy" saying those crazy things again. I just feel so delusional! Am I making things up? Am I completely unaware of what is actually going on around me? I am going nuts here just trying to get through the days.......

who even knows if getting out of this place, this school, this apartment, will even help...it could go on forever. It is more likely that I am the problem rather than the rest of the world...the odds are definitely against me. It's about 5,999,999,999 to 1...

I don't want to try anymore. I don't want to talk anyone. I don't want to go to school. I don't want to do anything...I just want to run away with Ben to some perfect paradise and live happily ever after....I know I have a lot of blessing and am lucky to not be whatever starving creature in whatever unfortunate country but the fact is that was not my fate and I am have my own situation that I am dealing with now and I am upset. I am allowed to be upset inspite of how lucky I am in many ways and I am SICK of people telling me to "think of these people and their terrible situation. At least you aren't them" No, I am not, but I can still have feelings and no one can try to take those away from because they don't like how my feelings are effecting their day. Well those people can stop being selfish for 5 seconds and realize that things aren't just peachy keen in my life right now and that is OK. It doesn't have to always be sunshine and teddy bears because LIFE is not sunshine and teddy bears. Things suck. Without things sucking there can never be sunshine and teddy bears because we would never have a scale to judge what is good and what is bad.

So right now, things suck and I can't WAIT to be in rainbow kitty land with the rest of those that like to tell me to stop having emotions and just be postive.

On a lighter note, I have no idea how I am going to get to school, my dr. appt tomorrow, or work .... My car still is not starting...